2016 Thanksgiving Menu

I’ve been asked several times to share my Thanksgiving menus. Each year I like to choose a theme. Last year I went with a Southern Thanksgiving. This menu is filled with all the flavors that give southern food its unique flair. I’ve included links to the recipes, tips & tricks and photos from our meal last year.

Deep Fried Turkey 

I never said this menu was going to be healthy but it’s Thanksgiving. It’s the one day a year it’s socially acceptable to be gluttonous. Deep frying a turkey opens up highly coveted oven space. It also helps the meat stay moist and the skin to stay crispy.

Cajun Ham with Bourbon Glaze

This recipe makes use of a rotisserie attachment on your grill. It once agains free up space in the oven. You can always make this in the oven or in a pan on the grill if you don’t have a rotisserie. I also insert cloves into my ham before cooking.

Make Ahead Turkey Gravy

One negative to deep frying your turkey is you don’t get all those yummy drippings needed to make gravy. I found this make ahead turkey gravy. It saved time on the big day by being prepped in advance.

Stuffin Muffins

At the last minute last year I decided to not make these as muffins. I was worried I wouldn’t be able to remove them from the muffin pans without losing most of the stuffing. I followed the same recipe and just baked it in a 9×13 dish.

Pimento Mac and Cheese

This macaroni and cheese uses all the flavors from a classic southern staple–pimento cheese. Again, not the healthiest recipe but for one day a year I don’t feel bad about it and neither should you!

Spinach Madeline

My favorite side dish at steakhouses is always creamed spinach. It’s a go-to for me. I was doing some research on southern side dishes and found this recipe. It does use Velveeta which I know a lot of people don’t like. However, it melts beautifully.

Black-Eyed Peas with Bacon and Pork

I love this side dish because you can utilize your slow cooker to make it. Who doesn’t love a recipe that calls for pork shoulder and bacon? No one. That’s who.

Sweet Potatoes

I don’t have a recipe for last year’s sweet potatoes. This one was brought by a family member. A big tip from me is to always utilize your guests to help cut down on your work. Thanks to the Kyle family for making and bringing these last year.

Green Bean Casserole

This is a Thanksgiving staple. Again, I utilized a family member to assist on this one. Thanks to the Driggers family for making and bringing this side dish last year.

Kicked Up Corn Maque Choux

This is by far my favorite Thanksgiving side dish! I had leftover andouille sausage from a crawfish boil we had earlier in the year. I added that and it made this dish! So good. This one will make the menu every year regardless of the theme!

Holiday Mashed Potatoes

I don’t have a recipe for this one either. This is something my mother-in-law makes each year that my husband loves. It’s almost like a mashed potato casserole. If I can get the recipe I will update the post!

Collard Greens

My husband’s best friend Justin loves to cook like I do. Every year he and his wife Nicole (my best friend!) join us for Thanksgiving. Justin is always so respectful of honoring my theme. He had a recipe for collard greens so I told him to do his thang! They were so good!

Biscuits with Apple Butter

My mom isn’t much of a cook. So, every year I have her bring the bread/rolls/biscuits. Last year my mom brought biscuits from Cracker Barrel. I didn’t make the apple butter. I purchased it from Williams-Sonoma. Again it’s best to take assistance or shortcuts where you can.

Orange Amaretto Cranberry Sauce

I know a lot of people don’t like cranberry sauce because it reminds them of the canned gelatinous junk. I didn’t cook this down into a sauce but instead made it into a relish. Go a little lighter on the amaretto liqueur if they are children at your meal.

Pumpkin Pie

This is yet another full fat flavorful recipe. Paula Deen doesn’t play when it comes to southern food. This pumpkin pie turned out great and will probably be a go to for my menus for years to come.

Maple Bourbon Pecan Pie

As a kid I can remember pecan pie giving my grandma fits. It can be really finicky. A lot of times it won’t set and firm up. I was a little nervous about making this recipe for the first time for Thanksgiving but it turned out beautifully.

 

Southern Style Caramel Cake 

In my research I found caramel cake is a pretty popular southern staple. I can cook but baking isn’t for me. So, I found a lovely place in Broad Ripple that sells southern style caramel cake. It’s pricey but it was totally worth it for Thanksgiving.

Apple Cider Sangria

Some years if I’m feeling particularly ambitious I will make a signature drink. Sangria is usually very easy and most people enjoy it. This one brought together the fall flavors of apple cider and cinnamon and wine.

 

101 Spring Cleaning Tips

It’s the time of year for spring cleaning again. Here are 101 Spring Cleaning Tips to help you up your cleaning game. It's the time of year for spring cleaning. Here are 101 Spring Cleaning Tips to help you up your cleaning game.This list of tips is split into helpful categories based on the area of the home to be cleaned.

Are you looking for ideas using common or natural household items in your spring cleaning? Maybe you need tips for getting the job done more efficiently or finding the spots that are commonly forgotten. You’ll even find ideas for getting more organized. This complete spring cleaning list has you covered. Take a look and find ways to help you get started and tackle the tasks in a whole new way.

This post contains affiliate links. Dish-y.com may earn a small commission on any purchase made after clicking through one of those links.

101 Spring Cleaning Tips

Spring Cleaning Tips for the Kitchen

  1. Don’t forget to clean the inside of your dishwasher. It can harbor lots of nasty bacteria. Dishwasher Magic is a great product for cleaning the inside of your dishwasher.
  2. After cleaning your sink apply a few drops of mineral oil to a towel and rub into the sink. It will prevent water from building up which can create mold.
  3. Clean the garbage disposal with lemons, salt and ice cubes. Or you can buy these.
  4. To clean a glass range, use this product. It’s a lifesaver. Simply apply to glass range, let sit for 10-15 minutes and then buff clean with a microfiber cloth.

  1. To avoid burnt on stains in the first place on your glass range, clean up a spill immediately with a damp cloth.
  2. To clean stainless steel appliances use these wipes. They don’t leave streaks and are safer for stainless steel than most cleaning products.
  3. Always wipe stainless steel in the direction of the grain. Take a close look at your appliance. You should be able to tell the direction.
  4. Don’t forget to clean out the inside of your trash cans. Just because you put liners in them doesn’t mean they don’t have gross bacteria lurking in them. Take them outside and pour some Dawn dish soap inside. Then fill with a garden hose and let sit. You may have to scrub to get stubborn stains out. Then rinse clean and air dry.
  5. Clean small stainless steel appliances like a toaster oven or coffee maker with a damp sponge and a little cream of tartar.
  6. Have a half-filled garbage bag? Pull it out of the garbage can and use it to throw out old food from the fridge. This way you don’t fill up a bag unnecessarily and it doesn’t smell up the house.
  7. If you’ve ever burnt something you’re cooking and the odor is lingering, take an oven safe dish and add a few drops of vanilla extract. Place in a 300 degree oven for 2 hours. The burnt smell will disappear, and your house will smell like baked goods!
  8. If you’re like me, I’ve always just put the whole blender in the dishwasher never taking it apart. Imagine to my horror what it looked like when I did! It’s important to take the bottom piece and the blade out. Gunk builds up in between the seal. Just toss in the dishwasher to clean.
  9. Do you have cooking pans with burnt on greasy grossness? Mix 1/2 cup of baking soda, 1 teaspoon Dawn dish soap and 1 to 2 tablespoons of hydrogen peroxide. Apply to the pan and let sit for about ten minutes. Take a sponge and get to scrubbing! Rinse and the stains disappear like magic.
  10. Clean a regular coffee maker with equal parts water and vinegar. Add into the water tank and run through. Then run through 3 more times with just water.
  11. You can also clean out hard water stains from the glass carafe by mixing 1 cup white distilled vinegar with ½ cup salt and the juice of a lemon. Add a handful of ice cubes. Swirl the mixture around in the carafe for a minute and rinse clean.
  12. Coffee and tea often leave stains on the bottom of coffee cups (just think what it does to your teeth!). Rinse your mug with hot water. Add a small amount of salt and a small drop of Dawn dish soap to a damp cloth. Rub the mug until the stain disappears and rinse.

  1. Clean a coffee or spice grinder with stale bread. Tear up the bread into pieces and then grind. The bits will stick to the bread which you can then dump out and throw away.
  1. Do you have burn stains in the metal part of your crock pot? Spray the metal part with oven cleaner and let sit for 5-10 minutes. Wipe clean and rinse.
  2. Clean and freshen your microwave with a steamy mix of water, citrus and vinegar: Mix together ¼ cup water, ¼ cup vinegar and a couple tablespoons of lemon juice. Saturate a washcloth and place it in the microwave for 2 minutes on high. Let the washcloth sit in the microwave for another 2 minutes. The steam created will loosen stuck-on food so you can wipe it clean. Your microwave will be left smelling fresh as new!
  3. Get hard to remove baked on stains from your muffin tins by soaking the pans in hot water with a dryer sheet for a few hours. The stains will wipe right off.
  4. Clean rust from old loaf pans by cutting a potato in half. Apply dish soap to the cut end of the potato and scrub the loaf pan. Rust stains will disappear!
  5. Clean your stainless steel sinks by applying baking soda. Scrub with a sponge. Rinse with vinegar. Scrub again with a sponge. Take a lemon or orange peel and scrub the sink against the grain of the stainless steel. Finally, buff with a paper towel and a few drops of olive oil.
  6. You can clean out the inside of your toaster with a small paintbrush or toothbrush. Just make sure the toaster is unplugged.
  7. Remove mineral deposits from the water dispenser area of the refrigerator by soaking a washcloth with equal parts hot water and white distilled vinegar. Set the washcloth in the dispenser and soak for 5 minutes, then wipe clean.
  8. If your glass oven door is covered with grimy, baked-on spatters, make a paste with baking soda and hot water. Apply to the glass, and let sit for 15-20 minutes. Using a scouring pad, scrub in circles until the grime is removed from the glass. Wipe clean with a wet washcloth. For tough spots, scrape with a razor blade. Enjoy being able to see into your oven again!
  9. If your cast iron skillet needs a good deep cleaning (since you can’t use soap!), scrub in a little vegetable oil and salt with a tough-bristled brush.
  10. Mix white distilled vinegar with some salt to polish tarnished copper cookware or serveware.
  11. If your blender is made from thick plastic instead of glass (like Michelle’s Ninja Professional Blender), make it shine like glass by rubbing a super thin layer of olive oil all over the surface after a good cleaning.

Spring Cleaning Tips for the Bathroom

  1. If you have glass shower doors follow this tip our builder told me when we built our house. Treat the glass with Rain-X to repel water and keep the glass clean.
  2. Do not use bleach tabs in the back of your toilet. I’ve had a plumber to my house several times and he told me they break down the plastic pieces of your toilet.
  3. Is your shower head spraying every direction but down? Take a large Ziploc bag and fill it with vinegar. Submerge the shower head in the vinegar and tie the bag on to the nozzle. Leave to soak overnight. Remove the bag in the morning and let hot water run for a few minutes to clear the shower head of the vinegar.
  4. Nasty shower curtains or liners? Wash them in the washing machine with regular laundry detergent and a few towels. The towels will help scrub the curtain/liner clean.
  5. Clean the grout in your shower by dipping an old toothbrush in bleach and scrubbing. Just make sure to throw the toothbrush away. You definitely don’t want to get those confused.

  1. Did you know that a damp pumice stone is abrasive enough to remove stains without harming the porcelain of your toilet?
  2. Clean your toilet brush between each cleaning of your toilet. Add bleach and hot water to a bucket and submerge the brush for a few minutes. Pour the bleach water down the toilet and rinse the brush out with hot water.
  3. You can clean your sink drains by pouring vinegar or baking soda down them, and then flushing with hot water.
  4. Bacteria can lurk in bathroom hand towels. Replace them every few days. Wash them using the sanitizing setting on your washing machine if you have one. If you don’t have that setting, use regular bleach for whites or color-safe bleach for colors.
  5. Don’t forget to clean the ventilation fan in the bathrooms. First, flip the circuit breaker for safety. Remove the cover and soak in warm soapy water. Use your vacuum nozzle attachment or a dust buster to clean the fan blades. Wipe them down with a damp cloth and let dry. Once dry, replace the rinsed and dried cover. Don’t forget to flip the circuit breaker back.
  6. Clean your makeup brushes with baby shampoo. Run them under warm water. Then place a small amount of baby shampoo in the palm of your hand. Next, swirl the brush around in your hand. Rinse the brushes and re-shape them. Lay out on a dry cloth to dry.
  7. Remove hard water stains from your glass shower doors or bathtub by mixing 1 cup of Epsom salts, ½ cup of baking soda and ¼ cup of liquid dish soap and applying the mixture to the dry surface working in a circular motion. You can even let it sit for a few minutes and then scrub again. Rinse clean and dry.
  8. When cleaning the bathroom, spray down all the surfaces with a disinfecting cleaner first. Allow the cleaner to sit for a few minutes before wiping to help remove stubborn stains and work its magic on the lingering germs.

Spring Cleaning Tips for the Laundry Room

  1. Clean your dryer cleaner vent by removing the tray (along with its contents) and then vacuum using your hose attachment.
  2. Your iron can sometimes hold onto residue from the clothes you’ve ironed. You can buy a cleaning product to remove it, or you can try the salt method. Take a piece of paper or old towel and sprinkle salt on it. Then (using a hot iron) iron over the salt several times. Let the iron cool and wipe clean.
  3. Lint can accumulate in the dryer vent hose. Remove it with an extendable duster or vacuum it out with the crevice attachment.
  4. Clean flip flops by sticking them in the dishwasher. Just make sure to turn off the heated drying cycle.
  5. Club soda will remove almost any stain. I bartended in a restaurant and khakis were part of our uniform. Anytime I spilled red wine on them I just sprayed down a towel with club soda and applied to the stain. Once you wash the item the stain is gone.
  6. Clean your washing machine. It seems like an oxymoron but it’s necessary. Some washing machines have a tub clean cycle. If not, fill the tub with hot water and add two cups of vinegar. Let sit one hour. Then turn the machine back on and cycle through all the way. Fill the tub up yet again and add two cups of bleach. Let sit one hour. Turn the machine on and cycle through all the way again.
  7. Clean blood stains out of clothing by rubbing salt on it and then washing normally.

Spring Cleaning Tips for the Living Room

  1. Nasty carpet stain? Mix 1 part Dawn dish soap with two parts hydrogen peroxide. Apply to stain and allow to sit for a few minutes. Scrub and blot. The stain will disappear.
  2. If you’re like me, you may have candles sitting out that you don’t burn. They can collect dust. Wipe them clean with an old pair of pantyhose.
  3. Believe it or not, dust builds up on light bulbs, as well. Unscrew the light bulb, and wipe clean with a dry microfiber cloth.
  4. To clean the tracks of your windows or sliding glass doors, dip a Q-tip in white vinegar and run it along the track.
  5. Dust lamp shades with a lint roller.
  6. Pesky dog or cat hair tumble weeds? I went old school and bought myself a dustbuster for spot cleaning.
  7. Cloudy glass vases can be cleaned with rubbing alcohol. Add a few drops in the top of the vase and swirl around. Pour out the alcohol and let air dry. Simple as that!
  8. Dust the top of ceiling fans with a dryer sheet secured around a clean extension rod paint roller.
  9. When sweeping out of your fireplace, sprinkle some used coffee grounds in to minimize dry ashes from circulating into the air.
  10. Clean leather furniture with a mix of ¼ cup olive oil, ¼ cup vinegar and 10 drops of any citrus essential oil. As always, test on a small area first. Then apply to a rag and work in circular motion to apply to the leather. Wipe dry with a clean towel.
  11. Cleaning the walls becomes a little easier using a Swiffer. Either use the damp cleaning cloths designed for the cleaning head, or simply attach a damp, soapy cloth.
  12. Baseboards and molding with intricate patterns can be difficult to get really clean with only a sponge or cloth. Use a slightly damp soft-bristled brush to scrub away sticky dust for all the grooves, then wipe clean with your cloth.
  13. Dust the blinds easily using an old pair of cotton gloves or a sock. Run your fingers over each rung to wipe the dust away.
  14. A soft-bristled paint brush can be used to gently brush dust out of the corners of delicate picture frames.
  15. Clean out narrow glass vases with a mixture of white distilled vinegar, rice and lemon juice. Place your hand over the open end and shake vigorously to scrub away water stains on the inside.

Even More Spring Cleaning Ideas

  1. Use microfiber cloths vs. paper towels. They don’t leave behind streaks and are better for the environment and your wallet. These come in a variety of colors.
  2. Disinfect your sponges by wetting them, squeezing out the excess water and nuking them in the microwave for 60 seconds.
  3. Magic Erasers work on virtually everything. I use them to clean marks off walls, to clean the baseboards and to scrub the tubs, showers and sinks.
  4. Start cleaning from the top down. Start in the highest part of your house and work your way down but…
  5. Focus on one particular task vs. one particular room. For example, start with dusting and begin upstairs. Work your way to the lowest level dusting only. Then move back up to the top and move to the next task. Much quicker and more walking=more exercise for you!
  6. Keep cleaning supplies in a shoe holder in an out of eyesight room. It helps to keep you organized with all supplies in one place.
  7. Make the time go by quicker by enlisting a friend or family member to help.
  8. If you can’t find someone to help you, listen to music. Choose something with an up tempo or beat and your cleaning will go much more quickly.
  9. Believe it or not, your mattresses need to be freshened up. Add 1 cup of baking soda and a few drops of lavender essential oil. Mix well. Then take a mesh strainer and sprinkle over your mattress. Allow the mixture to sit for one hour and then vacuum.
  10. If you have any brass in your home (family heirlooms, kitchen accessories, etc.) clean them using half a lemon and a teaspoon of baking soda. Mix into a paste and buff into the brass. Rinse and wipe clean.
  11. Clean your granite countertop with a 50:50 solution of warm water and 91% isopropyl alcohol. Mix in a spray bottle and let sit for 3 to 5 minutes. Then rinse with water and dry with a microfiber cloth.
  12. Remove mold from plastic water bottles by filling the bottle up ⅔ of the way with hot water and a splash of bleach. Put the lid on and shake. Then let sit for a few hours. Simply rinse out and run through the dishwasher. Good as new!
  13. Scuff marks on linoleum or tile floor? Dab a bit of rubbing alcohol on a paper towel and rub over the mark. It will lift right up.
  14. Don’t neglect your air vents. Carefully, remove the vent plate. Vacuum out the duct. Wipe around the vent with a damp sponge
  15. Your mattresses hold dust mites, skin, etc. Vacuum the mattress. Then spray a mix of equal parts of hot water and vinegar. Allow to dry and good as new!
  16. Dehumidifiers are great during the winter months. Take it apart. Add vinegar to the base and the tank. Then use an old toothbrush to clean around the small pieces of the machine. Then rinse with hot water several times.
  17. People forget their pillows. Simply clean them by sticking two in the washing machine. Adding two keeps the machine balanced.
  18. Clean your rings with a baking soda and water paste. Simply use an old toothbrush to apply and scrub.
  19. Put a few drops of your favorite essential oil onto a new air filter when you replace the old one. The essential oil will permeate throughout your house.
  20. Have a funky cooking odor in your house? Simmer a pot of water with a few drops of cinnamon or clove essential oil. The smell will disappear.
  21. Wipe your computer monitor clean with equal parts distilled water and vinegar. Mix in a spray bottle, spray on a microfiber cloth and wipe your screen down.
  22. Unclog slow drains by mixing ¼ cup of baking soda, ¼ cup of salt and ¼ cup of cream of tartar. Shake together in a small jar. Sprinkle half the mixture down the drain followed by 2 cups of boiling water. Allow the mixture to sit for at least an hour and then rinse with cool water. Your drain should be free of debris.
  23. If your drain is still slow, try pouring one cup of baking soda down the drain followed by one cup of vinegar. The bubbles created should attack and clear any debris.
  24. Glitter can be especially difficult to remove. You can easily pick it up from floors and carpet by taking a ball of Play-Doh and rolling it over the mess.
  25. Clean plastic toys by running through the dishwasher with ½ cup of vinegar.
  26. Your car dashboard can seem to hold on to every piece of hair and dust. Simply wipe with a coffee filter to remove dust and debris.
  27. Yoga/Pilates mats can harbor bacteria if not cleaned properly. Add distilled water to a squirt bottle. Add 2 drops of tea tree oil and 1 drop of lavender oil. Spray down a down and wipe your mat clean.

  1. My garage doors are always open it seems. Old leaves blow in during the fall and seem to build up without my knowledge. Move your cars out and use a large push broom to make a pile. Then using gloves (those hands are delicate!) put them into trash bags.
  2. Speaking of the garage, we live in a wooded area with spiders. They love to create webs all across my garage. I purchased one of these for those webs way up high.
  3. You can also use Rain-X Glass Treatment on the exterior of your windows after a thorough cleaning to keep them sparkling longer throughout the year.
  4. Need to soak your faucets with white vinegar to remove lime buildup? Put the vinegar on your rag and wrap it around the faucet, securing it with an old hair clip. Let it sit for up to an hour until the stains wipe away easily.
  5. A product like Quick Shine Floor Finish is a great alternative to refinishing floors. Apply to clean floors and dry for 30 minutes, and your hardwood or laminate will shine like new!

Spring Cleaning Organization Tips

  1. The easiest way to keep a pantry clear of old items? Organize it. The Container Store sells some great items to keep your pantry uniform. Keep all canned goods together. I even organize those by what the item is and keep those together. It’s much easier to go right to the sauces to see if any are past their expiration date.
  2. Throughout the day, I pick up items around the house that need to go upstairs. I place them at the base of the stairs until the end of the day and take them all up at once.

  1. Closets need spring cleaning, too! I go through section by section (assuming they haven’t all melded into one!) and take out anything I haven’t worn/used in over a year. I put everything into three piles. Donate, sell (re-sale boutiques are hit or miss but you can try), and throw out.
  2. Then I organize everything into its proper section. Tank tops, short-sleeved shirts, long-sleeved shirts, pants, dresses, shorts, etc. Then I put like colors together. Nothing feels better than looking at an organized closet!
  3. The most annoying part of my house? The infamous junk drawer. It seems like everything my husband doesn’t know what to do with ends up in the junk drawer. I take every single thing out and put like items together. I also throw out things I don’t need. I’m looking at you, old ketchup packets! I purchased drawer organizers like these from The Container Store.
  4. When in doubt…alphabetize! I do this with my spices, air fresheners, etc. Helps to keep them handy and easy to grab.

7 Things All Children of Single Parent Homes Have in Common

Growing up, I was child of a single parent home. My dad wasn’t around or even involved in any way. I don’t know the reasoning or thought process of him not being involved from one side or the other. I just know he wasn’t. And, honestly, lately I have decided that is enough for me. I’m a very introspective person and am constantly looking at things I do and trying to figure out why I do them. I’ve long since noticed these things in myself but recently noticed some other friends

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They’re used to fending for themselves. As a child in a single parent home, most days I got myself off the bus, got home and hung out alone doing homework until my mom got home from work. There wasn’t always money for a baby-sitter or day care. I was very used to being on my own and handling my business. It’s so weird but now I enjoy other people NOT having to fend for themselves. I don’t want the people I care about or love to have to do everything on their own like I did as a kid.

They feel bad for putting more work on the one parent they do have. As a kid in a single parent home, you take on more adult responsibilities because you don’t want to add to your mom or dad’s stress. I have always wanted to please my mom because she was the only parent I had around growing up. In my eyes, if I could something that made her life easier (because she’s done a lot for me!) and not put so much stress on her, I would do it.

They’re subliminally trying to be a better person than the parent that wasn’t around. It’s always in the back of my head. I will never put anyone else (children or no children) in the situation I was in as a child. I always want to be a better person than the person that chose not to be a part of my life. I don’t want to make others feel the way I felt growing up. I have consistently made choices in my life to a better person than the parent that wasn’t around.

 

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They need constant approval and praise. It’s a hard thing to love a person who came from a single parent home. When Austin and I first met, I was always trying to get his approval or praise. Probably to the point of annoyance. I constantly needed to be reinforced that he care about me or loved me. You’re seeking the praise you never got from the parent that isn’t there. It’s hard for the other person to understand that you’re only this way because you have a deep-rooted fear of abandonment.

They need to be in control. Oh, man. I am a CONTROL FREAK. If I can plan something vs. having someone else make decisions for me I will do it. I would rather be the person making my decisions. It boils down to this…as a child you didn’t have control over being a child in a single parent home. You didn’t have control over the other parent not being there. And it felt terrible. So, in your mind, you want to control everything you can so you don’t ever feel like a bystander in your own destiny.

They feel guilty. Guilt is the worst human emotion possible. I felt guilty all the time for my other parent not being there. It’s almost as if you think YOU’RE the reason the other parent chose to leave. Throughout the years, I have come to realize that was a choice made by a grown up that had zero to do with me. But, that didn’t mean I didn’t still feel guilty the parents wasn’t there. Feelings of guilt then cause you to go overboard in other ways.

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They don’t know how to maintain romantic relationships. This one is especially tough. When you grow up in a single parent home, you don’t always grow up around a healthy, adult, romantic relationship. For a lot years, I searched for just anyone because it meant I had someone. As I moved through life, I realized just having someone is different than having someone of quality in my life. By the time, I met the right person…I did all the wrong things. I was jealous, clingy, untrusting. It’s taken a lot of years to move past those feelings and not make him pay for me not having a dad around as a kid.

These are just a few commonalities I have noticed in children of single parent homes. What have you noticed in yourself or others?

 

 

The Ultimate Guests’ Guide for Thanksgiving

Chances are if you’re not hosting Thanksgiving in your home, you’ll be attending a dinner at someone else’s house. It can be intimidating showing up to a Thanksgiving dinner with friends. Do I bring a dish? Do I know what my host’s hospitality agreement is and what that even means? Well, fear not, friends. Here is your ultimate guide to being the best guest at Thanksgiving dinner.

 

Always Ask Before Bringing a Dish or Dessert-I mentioned this in my previous post, but for hosts Thanksgiving is their Super Bowl. Chefs love to determine the menu well in advance. Some people will even have a theme. While it’s very nice to offer to bring something, always ask your host what you can bring. You don’t need two types of corn. If you’re asked to bring a specific item, bring that and nothing else. Most of the time, the items you’re bringing are an added bonus to the menu for the host.

 

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Always Bring a Gift-If you’re not bringing a side dish, make sure to always bring some type of gift for the host. This is just simple manners, but sometimes easily overlooked. Wine always goes over well. In my house especially. Hey! Try to find out a little about your host before you decide on a gift. You might have to do some homework. Put those hours of Facebook stalking to good use.

 

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Don’t Go Overboard-If you aren’t able to find any clues about your hosts likes and dislikes from your Facebook stalking, a mid-range bottle of wine is always good. Personally, I think an easy drinking wine like Pinot Noir suits most palates. This is one my favorites. Or, a small journal for the host to keep track of their Thanksgiving dinners is always a thoughtful gift.

 

Stay Out of The Kitchen-Unless you’re asked to do something in the kitchen or the host says it’s okay to hang out there, hang out somewhere else. There are a lot of moving parts to hosting dinner, and a lot of that occurs in the kitchen. For a cook, to have to work around people standing in front of their drawers or oven is just plain annoying.

Make Yourself Useful in Other Ways-Offer to get other guests their drinks. Play bartender. Or, offer to set the table. Jump on clearing the table. Wash dishes. Take out garbage. All of these little things are extremely helpful to a host. After dinner is served a host typically feels like they can relax. Let them enjoy that moment.

 

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Don’t Get Too Drunk-No one likes Drunk Uncle. Well, we do, but you don’t want to be that guy. Keep your drinking in check until children are gone or the hosts have began letting their guard down. And for heaven’s sake, don’t drink all the hosts booze. At least bring something to offer and share.

Acknowledge the Host’s Hospitality Agreement-What I mean by this is as a guest it’s important to make some sort of verbal acknowledgment of the hosts rules. I love hearing a guest say ‘It’s your day, tell me how I can help. I’ll do whatever you need’. You are validating to the host you know how stressful hosting can be.

 

Bring a Dish that Doesn’t Require Much Work-Great! You’re bringing a side dish. Awesome. Thanks so much. Don’t bring something you will have to assemble in the host’s kitchen. If it’s a dish the host can pop in the oven, great. If it’s something that can go in the fridge, even better. A simple Caprese salad is always a great addition.

 

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What for the Host to Offer a To Go Box-Don’t assume there will be enough food for you to take in your doggy bag. Remember how I said it’s the Super Bowl for chef-y types? Typically, they have an idea already brewing in their head for what to do with that leftover turkey, and it doesn’t involve you. 

 

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If you follow these simple rules for attending Thanksgiving feasts, you will always be considered a great guest!

13 Rules to Live By When Hosting Thanksgiving

It can be a little daunting hosting Thanksgiving at your home. Will the turkey explode into a dried mess when you cut into it? Will your drunk uncle go off on a tangent about those Starbucks cups? Will people like the new chef-y recipe you came up with for stuffing stuffed artichokes? I have now hosted Thanksgiving in my home for the last three years. Here are a few rules to live by to make sure you end the day with your sanity and everything turns out beautifully.
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Determine Your Menu Well in Advance

First, brainstorm your menu. If you love to cook, (I hope you do! You’re hosting!) Thanksgiving is your Super Bowl. Many of us plan the menu months in advance, and more than likely, change the menu several times. With that being said, be flexible with changing it, if need be. Oh, your cousin who doesn’t eat meat is now coming? No problem! Add another veggie side dish. Always plan on extra, last-minute guests.

Have a Plan of Action for the Week of Thanksgiving

Have your grocery list ready to go the weekend prior to Thanksgiving. Get your groceries on Saturday, Sunday or Monday. Cut and prep veggies on Tuesday. Make your side dishes and pies on Wednesday. I make my dishes up until the point of needing baked. Then I refrigerate until Thursday.

Have a Written Plan of Action for the Day of Thanksgiving

I try to work backwards from the time I’d like to have dinner served. So, if I’m planning on serving dinner at 2pm, I need to work backwards to determine what time to get up, prepare the turkey and cook it. In a 325°F oven cooking times varies based on the weight of your bird.

  • An 8-12 pound turkey takes about 3-4 hours
  • 12 to 16 pound turkey takes about 4 hours
  • A 16-20 pound turkey takes about 5 hours
  • A 20 to 26 pound turkey takes 6 hours or more

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Remember, you should let your turkey rest for an hour at room temperature before roasting. Roast at 475°F for 30 minutes. Then turn the oven down to 350°F for the remaining time. If the skin is browning too quickly, simply cover it in foil. Should also let your turkey rest for 15 minutes before carving. The temperature of the turkey should be around 155°F, and no higher than 165°F. To take the temperature, place a meat thermometer into the thickest part of the thigh.

Invest in Space Saving Gadgets

I am lucky enough to have a double oven. With that being said, the turkey takes up one all on it’s own. I buy a 24 pound turkey, and yes, I’m crazy. So, there is no way all the side dishes can fit in the other oven without a little maneuvering. I found these handy dandy gadgets at Williams-Sonoma, and they are a life saver. They create vertical racks so that all your dishes fit.

Use Post-It Notes to Organize Cookware

If you want to use your favorite Rachel Ray dish for the green bean casserole, stick a Post-It Note in it that says green bean casserole. It just helps to visualize and keep you on track while cooking.

Have a Space for Guests to Hang Out

I know everyone loves to hang out in the kitchen. It’s the gathering place, and I get why. However, on Thanksgiving day, put your apps and snacks in a different room—the dining room, the living room, anywhere but your kitchen where you’re working. There is nothing worse than being stressed about the dinner, and having too many people in the kitchen seeing you cry into your lumpy gravy with your glass of Pinot Noir.

Create a Signature Cocktail

If you’re worried about your uncle getting too drunk before dinner, simply create a signature cocktail where you control the amount of alcohol guests consume. I usually create a sangria with a little wine, a little orange liqueur and club soda. This keeps guests out of the mixed drinks and straight up wine. It doesn’t keep me out of the Pinot Noir, but I’m hosting. I make the rules.

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Stick to What You Know

In my opinion, Thanksgiving isn’t the time to get crazy creative with your food. Risk taking is great. Just do it on a weeknight or well in advance of the big day. Don’t try to get too chef-y with your food. On Thanksgiving, most people are big on tradition. Stick to the basics. This will help alleviate stress when something new doesn’t turn out.

Always Have Snacks for Guests to Munch On

I always put out a veggie tray and a protein of some sort. Shrimp are a great option. The veggies will help fill them up with fiber and the protein will help keep hunger at bay. Stay away from serving bread. This fills the stomach, and you want them eating your perfectly cooked turkey and sumptuous side dishes.

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Don’t Focus too Much on Decor

If you’re hosting, the food is the star of your Super Thanksgiving Bowl—not the decor. Focus on the food. If you have a particularly creative or craft friend or spouse enlist their help. After all, most people care about the 3 F’s on Thanksgiving—food, family and football.

Don’t Be Afraid to Cheat Where You Can

Go ahead and use pre-made pie crust. It’s a time saver, and most of the time people only notice what is inside the crust anyway. I often buy frozen rolls. Again, it’s a time saver and no one really notices the difference.

Keep Track of Your Menu from Year-to-Year

Write down your full menu in a journal each year along with notes touching on what worked and what didn’t. I noticed after the first year, no one ate the sweet potatoes or pecan pie. So, not I don’t make a sweet potato side dish, and only serve pumpkin pie. This cuts down on waste, and helps with your planning.

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Enjoy the Moment

Remember, this is your Super Bowl. You’ve prepared for the big day months in advance. Take a minute to step back, look at your surroundings, listen to your screaming fans (your family) and just enjoy the moment. You did it! You hosted Thanksgiving without any major issues, and you deserve to find happiness in it.

7 Signs You’re in a Fantastic Place in Your Life

7 Signs You’re in a Fantastic Place in Your Life

A recent Today show segment mentioned that age 34 is the happiest time in a woman’s life. It was like a lighting bolt shocked me. I’m 34 right now. How does this year of my life compare to others? As I reflected on my life (the good and the bad) I realized this is the happiest I’ve ever been. But why? What’s changed? Here are a few things I’ve noticed have brought me to this fantastic place in my life.

  1. You’ve given up on the need to please everyone all the time.

I am a people pleaser. I know this. I want everyone to be happy. I want everyone to enjoy themselves in my home. Let’s just be honest. It’s not always possible to please everyone all the time. I’ve come to the realization if people aren’t having fun with you, in your home or with something you’ve created that’s their problem. Not yours.

When you start to truly trust your decision-making you don’t need as much validation from others. Just because someone disagrees with a decision you made doesn’t make you second-guess yourself.

 

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  1. You’ve finally figured out what qualities you’re looking for in a mate.

 I have always been a hopeless romantic. Even as a child I wanted to find love. For a very long time I didn’t know what I wanted, needed or deserved in a life partner. As I’ve gotten older things I thought were a big deal are suddenly not so much. Or things I didn’t place much value on moved up higher in the rankings. Really important with this one-notice I said qualities you’re looking for in a mate. You don’t necessarily have to have found that to say…

“I’m okay being single because this person doesn’t have the qualities I’m looking for in a partner”.

Even if you’re single you know your own relationship standards and you won’t settle for less. Those standards guide you and serve as a compass.

Never settle for anything less than an extraordinary love. 

 

Renee and Austin on their wedding day.

Renee and Austin on their wedding day.

 

  1. You’re comfortable spending time alone.

Growing up as an only child (this may confuse some of you as you’ve heard me speak about my sisters (another article for a different day) with a working, single mom I spent a lot of time alone. As a teenager and young adult I never wanted to spend time alone. I always wanted people around. In my 30’s I’ve come to relish my alone time.

I still love having people around and I love spending time with my husband but man, sometimes I like being able to sit on the couch with a glass of wine and watch my garbage television.

Another important part of this one that people struggle with is being able to go out and do things alone. Going out and eating dinner alone or having a glass of wine is not scary at all. It’s liberating! As it turns out, no one is staring at you and feeling sorry for you because you’re alone. If you’re worried about it take a look at the bar of any restaurant. There are always lots of people sitting down eating and drinking alone.

  1. You’ve cut toxic people out of your life. And you’re OKAY with it.

This one is so hard. I had to make a tough decision last year. Either deal with someone who was abusive or cut them out. I was in the middle of a very bad public situation that was very stressful. I decided that I had to make a choice for me. That’s not selfish. That’s being protective of you! I cut off communication with said person. It was difficult but there comes a point in your life when you have to say enough is enough. Abusive people will always continue to abuse you until you stand up for yourself and say “I’m not taking this anymore”. The bigger part of this scenario is that you have to be okay with cutting someone off. It’s hard. I questioned myself a lot but at the end of the day realized I made the decision and I needed to own it.

  1. You have figured out what makes you happy career-wise and have started doing it or have a plan to get there.

I’ve always known what I wanted to do as a career. Or at least a field. Somewhere along with the way I lost that direction. Perhaps taking a job     just to have a job when the economy is bad is just something you can’t control. However, I was working jobs that I didn’t love.

I was miserable. When you’re miserable you take it out on other people. I was just accepting these less than stellar careers and then making others unhappy because I was unhappy. I tend to give up when things get too hard.

I became complacent with doing nothing to make myself happy.

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I have always loved writing. I somehow lost that throughout the years. I always had one friend pushing me to write. Sometimes to the point of annoyance.

“Why aren’t you writing? It’s what you love and you’re good at it!” It finally just hit me. I need to make this happen. It’s not going to come to me without a little effort on my part. So I started contacting places that I thought might need writers and lo and behold here I am writing for Dish-y (well, that had already started) and for publication in Indianapolis. Michelle and I are even work to start a business.

If you aren’t happy with your career path sit down and figure out what you love to do. Then make a plan of how you can do that and make money. It might take a little time, effort and ingenuity but trust me it’s worth it in the end.

    1. You realize there is no such thing as “perfect”.

As women we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be the perfect friend,   sister, wife, mother, employee. It’s not realistic to think that we should all be size two (which I can tell you I don’t think I’ve ever been!). It’s not realistic to think that we should always wear makeup and have the perfect outfit for each event we attend. Sometimes you just have to let it go (you’re singing it in your head right now, aren’t you) and go out to the grocery store with no makeup.

Wear the flip flops because, lets be honest, heels hurt. Drink the glass of wine even though it’s not on your diet…maybe not the entire bottle which is a lesson I’m still teaching myself.  Oh, hell. Throw the diet out the window and ENJOY LIFE. Yes, still make time to work out to be healthy not just out of vanity.

  1. You’ve stopped letting your past be a crutch for your future.

This one is huge. HUGE. You like what I did there visually? In all seriousness, for a lot of years I used my past experiences in life to be a miserable person. I held grudges about the things that happened to me. I allowed myself to be reduced by them. I made myself a victim of myself.

See, people can do a lot of nasty things to you. How you choose manifest those things is all on you.

Yes, my dad wasn’t around growing up but I realized that wasn’t my husband’s fault. Guess whose fault that was? Ultimately, mine. Yes, there is blame to be put on my dad but me being nasty and unhappy was MY FAULT. I needed to realize the longer I held on to anger and hate the more it consumed me and took time away from my joy.

 

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Let it go, let it go. You’re singing again, aren’t you? Go on and do it. This is not to say that I have it all figured our or that my life is perfect. These are just little lessons that I’ve learned that I hope I can pass on to others to possibly spare them some of the turmoil I’ve experienced over the years. Life is too short to be anything less than happy. Work hard to create your happiness and you will be rewarded.